Up your nose

Up Your Nose,
With a rubber hose.

‘What a pack of porkers!’ I thought as I sat down in the C-PAP class. And most of them were overweight. But you would expect that with a bunch of people suffering from Sleep apnea. The Resp. Therapist explained the little C-PAP machine, how it worked and what it would be doing to us. Then she proceeded to help us fit the nose piece to our heads and turn the machine on. I immediately felt a wind blowing up my nose.
The idea of the machine, is to keep a constant flow of air going through your nose, into your lungs. This keeps the airway open by pushing your tongue out of the way. With the airway kept open, a person can breathe. This will reduce the Apnic episodes where you stop breathing.

And gosh, we all look as sexy as hell, with this clear plastic thing strapped to our heads and the tube leading away. On look at me tonight and Wonder Girl will be all over me!
Just as soon as she stops laughing.

So I will be on the test machine for a week, as it figures out the correct pressure. Then I will get my own machine, set to just the right flow of air.

I has been three nights with it. I am still getting used to it. I seem to wake up around 4am, with a freaking typhoon blowing up my nose! (I don’t want to hear any jokes about a blow-job gone bad!)
Now I am not one to fully wake up, so early in the morning(anytime before 7am is early) the mind is not there. This explains why I wake up at 7am and the machine is turned off and the headpiece is hanging off the bedpost! Someone took care of it and I don’t remember doing it.

Wonder Girl says that it has helped eliminate the snoring. The next thing is to see if I am more awake during the day. Because I constantly wake up part way, when I don’t breath, I don’t get a full, deep sleep. I guess time will tell.

At least I don’t sound like Darth Vader!