Someday Girl

Written 7-24-2010
Several years ago, when we were chatting with my late Aunt Obie, she told us this story. It was four years after her husband had passed away and she was chatting with a friend. Her friend told her that, if Obie had passed away first and after a suitable time, she would have asked Obie’s husband out. Because, she said, your husband was such a nice man.
Obie thought this was quite a compliment that her friend felt that way. When you are in your eighties, it’s more about having a pleasant companion.

My friend CG said a similar thing about a male friend of hers’. She said, “If he was twenty years younger, I’d marry him!”
And her friend is a nice guy and they enjoy each other’s company.

I have often wondered about some of my women friends. They are my friends primarily because I enjoy their company. Sure some of them are nice looking, but a number of them are quite average in looks. That’s okay because looks are not a friend criteria.

I am sure that people, as they get older, wonder about ‘what ifs’. Any of you who have been married for decades and have amassed a collection of friends might sometimes wonder, ‘what if I was suddenly a widow, or widower?’
You might then think that some of your friends could be suitable companions.

But there is a dark side to that.

Like the play, ‘Same time next year’, where the man begs his long time mistress to marry him, now that he is a widower. For there is a local widow who is making moves on him. And if his long time paramour doesn’t marry him, he might just have to give in to the widow.
What if you just want to keep your friends as friends? Do you crush their feelings when you tell them that you just don’t want to get ‘that friendly’ with them?
Sure, that can be a tough call.